Straight Up and Straight Through the Heart

I didn't want to go to Ciudad tonight. My body is fighting a cold and the last thing I wanted to do was go there especially when I would be alone as Milagros and Carolina couldn't make it. But I made the sandwiches, pulled on a sweatshirt and left the house. The weather is way colder now and the sweatshirt over my short sleeved T shirt did not cut it, I was cold. I wondered if I would see any of them tonight. Last Saturday I could not go and Carolina told me that they couldn't find any of the guys even after praying and walking all over the place. Honestly, tonight, I was so cold and my head was so heavy that all I cared about was my bed. I decided that if I didn't meet any of them, I'd just give the sandwiches away and get on the next bus home. 


The area that we used to go to all the time before was flooded and several streets below that area was flooded as well. It was awful; filthy water running through the streets like a river. I plucked my way through the water, hoping that the motor taxis would be considerate enough to not drive through the water quickly to splash the water up at pedestrians. I couldn't deal with getting wet with filthy water on top of feeling yucky. No one was at the corner where we used to go to. The flood did not make for a great hang out place. I went to the other street that was quieter, no one there either. I was ready to go home by this point and just wanted to get rid of the sandwiches when I decided to walk along the bus stop area in front of the market. I ran into Anderson who had big attitude today and it was a good thing he didn't hang around too long. Met Alex who had knife cuts all on one side of his face and  said he had gotten into a fight the night before. While talking to him, two other guys walked by and started mocking us, telling me I should bring Alex to a rehab centre and other unmentionable stuff. With the way I was feeling, I wanted to deck them. Instead, I turned the tables on them and said that they look like they need to go to rehab themselves so why would they point the finger at someone else. Anyways, what was really funny was that the Holy Spirit had me focus on one of the two guys and I ended up talking to him most of the night and giving him straight truth, no holds barred a la Adeline. And he listened. I didn't mince any words, just direct, straight through the heart truth and it hit him. He had me pray for him at the end and asked me to keep praying for him. His name is Carlos, yes another Carlos. 


William came by later and gave me candy for me and Carolina and then Carlos gave me a charm bracelet, one of the ones he sells on the combis. That was kinda neat cos most of them take but don't give so it was something different. I guess when I left, I felt that it was worth it to have gone out there tonight, and because I was feeling yucky, I didn't care if they were going to hear or not, I just went straight for the heart with the truth of the gospel the way I operate best and something shifted for me. I didn't care if they felt that they could trust me or not. I was there to help them, to help them see that through Jesus, there is an alternative and another opportunity to have a real life and it doesn't matter if they lie to me, manipulate me, whatever. If they never trust me to speak truthfully to me, it doesn't matter. But what matters is that I give them the truth of the gospel, straight up and straight to the heart and tonight I realized that I will do that, keep doing that, not mince words and not worry about them trusting me or not. It's not about me, it's about Him and He is the only One who can set them free. 


Oh and by the way, I didn't see a single robbery tonight. Pretty good huh? 

This is war.

I went to Ciudad today to meet up with Milagros the girl who sells cell phone calls as we had agreed to meet today to hang out. She never showed and Carla who was there said she hadn't seen her all morning. Then Carla told me about the burial today. I was a little confused thinking it was for Jose Carlos who was killed last Thursday but he had already been buried. Then she told me it was for Felipe who was killed by a combi last night as he was running. I know he was running away after robbing someone and was probably being chased and that was why he never saw the combi that hit him. Two deaths in one week. 


What bugs me is that they still think they're invincible and can get away with it all. I don't want to lose any more guys or girls. This is war. The enemy cannot do this anymore , not to them, not anymore. If you're reading this please pray for them, all of them who are lost and are the walking dead out there; please pray for their salvations, for them to be turned back to God and to choose life, for their hearts of stones to be changed into hearts of flesh, for the dry bones to live and rise up! Satan is trying to kill an entire generation and the generation that comes after; please don't let him. Please pray along with us for them.


With God, nothing is impossible, will you agree with me on this and pray for the youth in Ciudad?

Just Another Regular Night....

As I arrived at Ciudad in the bus tonight, a now very common scene unfolded before me; another guy being chased by thieves on the sidewalk except that this guy got away and the thieves, in frustration jumped onto a big city bus through the open back door, ran through it targeting cell phones easy for the picking. I really can't believe the audacity of these guys because as they were about to leave without getting anything, one of them saw a guy sending a text message on his cell phone in the seat just ahead of the back door and he leaned so far in, I couldn't believe the victim didn't feel his breath on his ear, and in one swift movement, the thief grabbed the cell phone out of the victim's hands and voila! just another regular robbery on the streets of Ciudad. This is truly becoming the norm of my opening paragraph every week. I guess I should write when there is no robbery instead. 


Tonight, we were told the guys no longer hang out at the same corner so we prayed to find them and went searching. We found them 2 blocks away, most of them in full work mode. Luis Enrique was there and he pretended that we did not exist. I don't get offended anymore because this is the way they are. However, later I realized why he ignored us. He was in work mode and every time he is with us, the Holy Spirit gobsmacks his conscience and he can't rob anyone after that and him being "at work" looking for pickings at that moment meant that he could not associate with us because he wouldn't be able to do what he thought he needed to do. God is working. 


We met new guys. Ronnie, Anibal, Jonathan, William. And they treated us with the same respect as the others normally do. God answered a prayer tonight in having us meet this group of newbies. The cops moved us away from the main drag and where we ended up being at was a great spot for being able to converse with them without distractions. Words of life got sown a lot tonight. I'm thankful for that. We found out that on last Thursday, one of them got killed with a knife to his chest by some other guys over a girl. He was around 18 and had a child by the said girl. His name was Jose Carlos Mata Gutierrez. I don't know if I know him but I name him here because he is not a nobody, not an invisible person. He mattered to many people who knew him even though he was involved in vices that hurt him and others. He was a living breathing person whose life was taken prematurely and violently. 


God actually protected Milagros and I lastThursday afternoon from being witnesses to this murder. We actually had made arrangements to meet up with our Carlos for lunch and we were there at 1pm and he did not show up. We looked for him for about a half hour and when we couldn't find him we decided to leave Ciudad to hang out together and have lunch elsewhere. If we had met Carlos, we would have still been there at Ciudad when the murder happened at 3:15pm close to where we had normally hung out with the guys. I know the time of it as one of the guys has the police report/certificate of the homicide and he showed me it. I have no idea how it got in his possession and I didn't ask. At first I was worried that the youth who passed away was our Carlos as we didn't see him tonight either. But our Carlos does not have a child and one of his names is Lucero and the other is Flores so I can seriously breathe a sigh of relief knowing it was not him.


Milagros the girl who works selling cell phone calls was friendlier tonight and we set up a time to meet next week to have lunch and hang out. She doesn't belong on the streets nor is she involved in any of the vices. She is a single mom who lives there and works there and she's actually a sweet person. On the way home, in the combi/micro (van used as a bus), the fare collector fell out of the combi and almost got run over by the same combi. As we pulled into a bus stop, he opened the sliding door, lost control of the door and fell out but he managed to keep his balance and grabbed onto something and I'm assuming it's the outside door handle  which allowed him to run alongside the combi until it stopped instead of being dragged under it. That was freaky. Nothing is normal on Saturday nights apparently.


Please pray for more labourers as there is only the three of us and we're all women. We need men in the field too, especially Godly men who can counsel and are able to love them with the Word of God.

My Socks Got Blessed Right Off!

 Today has been a very eventful day. A few weeks ago Siembra S.O.W. was blessed with some money and I have felt to get furniture for the refuge house with it like bunkbeds, mattresses, tables, stove/oven and possibly couches to begin with. I priced the bunkbeds first and they were a decent price but I hummed and hawed, not sure if I should get them. Then this week, I was introduced to Mercado Libre which is Peru's answer to Craigslist and I found 2 sets of bunk beds listed for about 60 soles less for each of them than what I had seen and they were of better quality wood and a larger size. After asking the vendor a few questions, I bought them unable to believe that they were still available. He came today with his wife, set up the bunkbeds in the dark (there isn't a light fixture to screw in a lightbulb in that particular room yet) while I used my cell phone as a flashlight. Then it turned out that the bed slats were a separate price altogether but they had failed to mention that in their listing so when he found out I didn't know about that, he waived it. I ended up paying an incredibly good price for  beds of high quality wood with free installation and slats. The guy actually lost money on this transaction but he wanted to do it even though I asked him 3x if he was sure. God sure is blessing His ministry.

This is the picture of one of the bunkbed listing in Mercado Libre. This is not how the actual room is for the guys, it's not even the house. :-but it's the bed for sure!!!

Milagros and I went to Ciudad today with a friend of hers, Erika. The guys were in full workload. As we got off the bus, three guys beat up a guy to steal from him on the street. No one lifted a finger to help the victim and we didn't know the three guys who were doing the stealing. Oscar was there, but Oscar ignores us and only comes near us when he is hungry. he wasn't hungry tonight and wouldn't even look at Milagros when she talked to him. Carlos was there and we spoke to him and every time I tell him how much we care about him, he tears up, even though he was half high today. I told him that we'll keep trying to be in touch with him because as soon as the refuge house is ready, and he wants to get off the streets, he definitely has a place all ready for him. He teared up. Then gave us big hugs. Milagros and I will meet up with him on Thursday to take him out for lunch and to be able to speak with him personally and away from the streets. I can't wait. 


The girls were non responsive today, staying and talking only within their tight circle. Aside from Carlos, there were no other guys out tonight, probably all working in some form or other. We saw a guy drive by in his car and about four girls selling themselves got into his car. The look he gave them was so lecherous, it made my skin crawl. Erika was wide eyed to everything that she was seeing and learning about and I wonder what she thought about it all. I didn't have the time to ask her tonight as we left Ciudad late and I had to catch my bus to get home. 


Even though most of the time it seems like nothing's happening, God is working on the inside of people and even if all we rescue is Carlos, it's worth it all. Please keep praying for Carlos, Oscar, Luis Enrique and all of them. They need you to care, more than they know it. 

The Stars In The Night Sky

Sometimes I am at odds at what I should do and what I do. Especially out on the streets. An older man got robbed last Saturday but did not get hurt in the process and while I did not see all of it, I caught the tail end of it. It is a fine line I walk, negotiating between doing what is right and keeping my mouth shut to gain the confidence of those I am called to serve. I could not say a thing to the police because that would completely annul every shred of trust I have built with the street youth. Yet, someone got robbed. It's such a strange world out there on the streets of Ciudad, codes of ethics and behaviours that are compassionate on one hand and yet, cruel on the other. For someone like me who sees in black and white, it is a world most difficult to manouever.


The man gets robbed, the thief grabbed his wallet from his pant pocket and takes off; the victim runs a few feet after him and his keys fall out from his pocket onto the street. The girls I was sitting with all yelled at another guy to pick up the keys to return them to the victim. While the guy goes to pick up the keys, the victim decided to chase after the thief and thus, did not realize that his keys had fallen out of his pocket. I watched, listened and mulled over it. Those girls are all with guys who steal and consume drugs. They all know what is right and wrong, they hate what their partners do but they choose to stay with them still, many of them spending days and hours out on the sidewalks with their babies, waiting for their boyfriends to be done with their "jobs". They watch as innocent people get robbed, saying nothing, like me, yet, they feel compassion to call for another person to return the victim's keys to him. I wonder, would the feelings of compassion and right and wrong die within them as they get accustomed to seeing delinquent behaviours happen regularly? Would their children grow up thinking it is normal?


I guess this is how hearts get hardened, how compassion and love and value of life dies eventually. I sit there, I watch and try to make sense of what I see around me. I don't understand on a heart level although I do in a psychological and pathological manner. I don't understand why there are older women with suckling babies sitting on the sidewalks selling candy when they say they have husbands who work but that they are there selling candy because they are bored staying at home. I watch as their teenage daughters hang out with people of questionable characters. Does ignorance override common sense? Or is common sense a learned trait?


I sat with teenage girls that night, all with babies in their arms and some with babies in their wombs, all waiting out there for their guys to finish "working". By 18, most of the girls already have 2 children. I asked some of the guys if they ever think about what they want to do for their futures and most of them figure that what they have is pretty good. I asked if the thought ever crossed their minds that they might get caught and be sent to prison some day. They looked at me as if I was crazy. They're invincible and cannot fathom the possibility of that or anything else happening to them. To someone else but not to them. It's a pretty good life that they have going. But the girls who live with them? The babies who are their children? Their thoughts only go as far as themselves. 




I sat with the girls that night and wanted to shake some sense into them. They know they have no futures with the guys that they're with. They know that one day they might never see the father of their children again. Yet, the heart, the ever irrational heart rules over them and they will stay with the guys and make no demands whatsoever. They will stay and accept the lifestyle that they lead. Why? Because they know no better? No. It's because they would rather live this lifestyle than face the fear of living a life alone. 


I pray that God will give me the opportunity to share Him with them more, on a one on one basis rather than in a group setting, and that he will provide the people needed for the home/refuge to get started so some of them can get off the streets. I fear for the babies, for the next generation, I fear that they will grow up believing that delinquency is normal, that a life on the street is normal and that there is nothing better for them out there. I fear that they will grow up not knowing how to dream, to see beyond and to learn that nothing is impossible. God showed Abram the stars in the night sky so he could grasp the vision and dream that God had in His heart for Abram and his descendants. I pray that for these ones on the street, they too will be shown the vision and dream that God has in His heart for them so that they could grasp and reach for the potential and future that is theirs.

Missionary Hands Out Sandwiches, Incites Riot On Eve of Presidential Elections....Just Kidding!!!!

I had fun tonight with the youth in Ciudad. And also almost got into trouble with the cops because they thought I was trying to incite something the night before the Presidential Elections. I went alone tonight because both Carolina and Milagros were unable to go and I went earlier than we usually do and it was actually a better time as almost all of them were there. The first person I saw was Andrea and she looked haggard for all of her 14 or 15 years. She had told me a few weeks back that she was smoking terokal again and wanted to be rehabilitated. I asked her about that today and she denied it and yet while we were talking she kept asking me when we were going to start the refuge and I asked her why and she said, "no reason". I wish her mother would take the responsibility and get her into a rehab centre. I walked around after talking to her and when I came back to the corner, almost all the guys and some girls were there and Luis Enrique waved me over. 


I crossed the street and went to greet them and they me and Marco Antonio actually laid a cardboard sheet on the sidewalk for me to sit on and aside from that it was on a dirty street corner and it was a sidewalk that they were inviting me to sit on, and they're all street youth, it might as well have been us all in someone's house and they were inviting me to sit on the couch. Carla was there today with the baby and it was good to see her again and we hugged. So while we were all chatting, there was about 12 or so of them around me and I was handing out sandwiches, cops suddenly showed up with their batons and encircled us. Everyone tensed up and I was going, "uh oh" in my head. The cops asked what we were doing there and that we had to disperse because people on the street didn't like seeing the guys together like that, thinking that they were going to steal from people. One of the guys explained that they were there to talk with me and also because I was handing out food. So then I explained that I was there to converse with them and to share food and that we weren't doing anything illegal. The same cop then said he thought we were up to something as well because tonight is the eve of the Presidential Elections. And one of the street vendors vouched for me and the guys to the cops and they left us alone but maintained vigil across the street and for good reason as that corner is the worst corner for robbery. Every week, except for the last week and today, every time we have been there, a robbery occured at least every 10 minutes. So, it was good the cops heightened their presence there.


It was difficult talking to the guys personally today as there were so many of them around and every one wanted to say something, but I got to pray with Carla and tell her that God accepts her the way she is and loves her no matter what she has done. Roberth, her boyfriend and father of her children was working in the buses tonight, playing for tips. It's good to know he is completely healed from the gunshot wounds in his abdomen. Carla was closed off today, she was happy to see me, wanted to sit by me but as soon as I said God accepts her as she is, she closed up. Oh well, He will pursue her for Himself. He has up till now and He won't stop. It was good to see Luis Enrique too. I hate what they do, in his case, rob people, but I don't want to see them go to jail and I am always afraid that when I go there, I would find out that one of them had been taken to jail. Luis Erique had a fat lip because he was with his girlfriend and 4 guys whistled at her and he went after them to beat them up and he got beaten up. I was like, "Couldn't you have just walked away?" and he was like, "They disrespected my woman, I could not let that go". Ok. Funny how if he had whistled at some girl, it would have been alright and would not have been disrespectful. Just as it is ok that guys cheat on their wives and girlfriends but heaven forbid if their girlfriends did that to them. There are at least 2  jealous-rage-murder stories that make it to the news everyday in this city alone, all perpetrated by men against their girlfriends or wives or ex-girlfriends because she was talking to some guy. Go figure.


I then asked if I could take photos of them some day and they all basically laughed in my face. None of them want to be recognized and I guess I have to figure out a way to get some pictures so I can do up a website. Sigh. On my way to the bus stop, I went to let the cop who had asked me all those questions know who I am and how many of us there are who go down to Ciudad and why we go there. And he was like, "So you're a missionary then." I nodded and he asked where I go to church and I told him. And then he was like, "Oh, I'd like to go to your church, what's the address?" Yeesh. Whatever his motive, he will hear the Word of God and that will never return void. So it's all good. 


As I got into the bus to go home, a guy in the back yelled, "Chorro!" and every one in the bus sprang into action and pulled shut the windows.  A thief had tried to steal that guy's MP3 through the open window but he managed to pull it back. My heart sank because I knew there was a good chance I would know who the thief was. I craned my neck to look and sure enough I did know who it was; Oscar. And there he was, after his failed attempt, scouting for other opportunities through other open windows. Yet in all of this, there is hope. It won't happen over night but we need to keep sowing God's Word and we need to love them but also in a tough way and change will happen. Also, God needs to bring more men and women to do this work because the 3 of us is not enough to reach out to so many of them. And there is a definite need out there in Ciudad de Dios.


By the way, just as a side note: They all like my Chicken Salad sandwiches. They think it's good and also "elegant". That warms the cockles of my heart (whatever that means) as I love making sandwiches for them. :-)

Ohhhh What Would Our Mothers Say....

Saturday night on the street was an eyeopener. I realized, well, Milagros and I both realized how sheltered we are. We went down later than usual to Ciudad, and there were a lot of police there and because of that, none of the guys were at their usual hang out. Milagros and I took the opportunity to walk around and check things out, to just stand and watch while at the same time search for the guys we know. We learned many things that night. There are gangs, independent thieves and the piranas, who are the guys we are reaching out to. We had already known that there are various groups but didn't know how they each worked. The gangs control and boss around the piranas, getting them to do their dirty work and rob people and in turn, they give them their pasta and money for terokal. The independent thieves like Luis Enrique work for themselves and generally in groups. 


We stood at the bus stop and, wow. We watched Oscar and two other guys scout out the mini buses, running in between each one, checking to see if any windows are rolled down so they can reach in and snatch whatever it is that is available to snatch off a person's lap or off their ears like MP3s, cell phones, etc. Nothing for those three that night. So they ended up washing the mini buses' tires on the fly to earn some change. The "cobradors" or the people who work in the mini buses collecting money off the passengers are in on this too, as they are the ones indicating to the thieves what is worth stealing on board. Then we watched as three older guys (early to mid 20's) climbed into each and every bus that came close to the stop, each walking the length of the buses inside, checking out every passenger to see if any had their cell phones or purses easily available for the picking. One thief stood behind a man who was using his cell phone in a bus, actually almost banging heads with the man trying to see the brand and make of the cell phone before deciding that it was not worth stealing. Milagros and I watched with our mouths hitting the pavement. The brashness, the boldness of what they were doing astounded us. Then the cops came and those three took off. Oscar and his friends left too but I called one of them back, a newbie named Carlos. The cop swung his baton, trying to make him leave but I called him back and Carlos walked towards us slowly while I asked the cop if I could speak to Carlos. The cop looked at me in disdain and rudely said, "What do you want to talk to them for? They're all thieves and nothing more!" and Carlos indignantly opened his mouth to start mouthing off to the cop and I just spoke directly to him and said, "No. Don't be rude." and Carlos shut his mouth. Milagros and I were amazed at the favour God had given us with them because we had never met this Carlos before and he actually listened to us and obeyed. When the cop realized he couldn't find fault with Carlos, he walked away and we started talking with Carlos to find out why he was there on the streets. He didn't want to tell us what he had been smoking but the smell of terokal was so evident that he couldn't deny it when I started telling him that terokal burns the brain cells and he agreed that he was having a hard time remembering facts every time he tried to study. He is 17 and in the last year of secondary school. He has a family and they are good to him and he goes home at nights. I think that while we were talking to him that night, he realized that what he thought was "fun" being out there might end up killing him one day and I think what got him the most was when I asked him outrightly if he wanted to be a slave to the gang members or other guys who had seniority on the streets for the rest of his life. He looked at me with horror and said he was going to return home. When we asked to pray with him, he asked if we could also pray for Anderson who had appeared on the scene. We prayed for the both of them. 


Anderson has grown up in appearance in the months we have been there. He is the 13 year old who has been on the streets since he was 6 years old. He looks more mature but still is as tough and trying to take advantage of every one that he can. He started to mouth off to me and I just gave him a warning look and said, "Hey, be respectful" and he too closed his mouth. An older man who was an alcoholic came up to us after we had prayed for the younger two and right away Anderson said to him, "Don't do anything to hurt them. They're "hermanitas". Hermana means sister and hermanita means little sister in an endearing way. They have taken it upon themselves to respect us with that form likening us to nuns which in this particularly perverse world of Ciudad is good, for our own protection. It was really interesting to see that they respected us and watched our backs. 


Today I went to price out furniture like bunk beds and tables and mattresses. I sense that this is the next step that I need to take and even though I can't see further than my nose especially in the area of who will come to stay with them 24/7 once we start the home, I sense that the Lord wants me to prepare the soil for when He brings the rain. So, there I was, pricing furniture. I am praying for a mature couple or 2 guys who are Godly and mature and who won't be easily manipulated by the street youth but who can and will treat them with respect and love and discipline when needed and who will also adhere to the routine set out for them. So to all who read this blog, please pray along those lines for this ministry. Until next time, be blessed.